..scratch that..

please disregard the previous post. no, my internet has not been down forever but i have been. =) i have been dying sick...yes, i am a drama queen but i think i really was dying. =p forget last weekends pics...we'll take new ones this weekend!! Lol, if u really want um lemme know...i'll email um to u. i am back well and alive...thanks for all the well wishes & especially YOU for my new house charger. I bought a new car battery today btw..lol. gee...neways...thats all for now...expect me back soon! =)

...trying...

Sorry...i am trying to post the pics from this weekend..TRYING...sorry wireless connection keeps fading in and out. i'll post them as soon as i can so u can steal them from here.
Oh! and Angela...ill put more pics from our "playdate" up...as soon as my connection comes back up, those were the onlee four that loaded. =/
love everyone to pieces!!

..stolen grapes..

O-o stop stealing my grapes!! o-O

..playdate..

`we decided it was finally time for the two pups to meet

O-o Jack n Tinkie o-O

O-o Angela n I o-O

O-o her view is awesome o-O

`homemade mojitos are yummy!

`cooking...angela n cindy style...lol!

`love u girlie...must do this again soon!

yum yum yum

thank u thank u thank u!
we were watching tv the other nite n i saw this on a 711 commercial...i was so excited! Hello Kitty & lychee...how could u possibly go wrong? i meant to go n get one but it totally slipped my mind, thank u for remembering and being so cute & bringing it to me on 7/11. Lol...its sooooo yummy!
thanks ~m u made me =)

..feel better aaron..

`aaron's first hospital stay

`poor baby...he's bored...

O-o smilin it up in his hospital bed o-O

O-o aaron & i o-O

O-o lemme fix u o-O

..adventures..

`a day of fun in the sun

`a much needed adventure to take my mind off of my current situation

O-o who wears a burberry bikini & headband & a dry clean only shirt to go hiking?

me, of course! lol =p o-O

O-o we made it to the top! o-O

O-o many fish in the sea..yet i want the one that keeps swimmin away from me o-O

O-o view from the top o-O

O-o standin @ the bottom o-O

O-o beautiful day o-O

O-o walkin in the jungle o-O

O-o swimming! o-O

`so i was up to my neck in the water n christy wasnt even wet yet...lol

..puffy eyes..

..*..thank you..*..



O-o i wanna smile like him o-O

O-o king gansta with my queen o-O

O-o my new friends to make me smile o-O

`didnt feel like goin out...wasnt feeling very cute last nite...puffy eyed...
`thanks for keeping me company n not letting me go home to weep some more...
`still dont understand completely but i'm okay so u be okay too?
`dont be sad cause i'm sad...
`remember what i said...its gonna be okay..someway...
`smile for me, it'll make me smile...
`thanks once again...love u to pieces!

..maybe..

i never knew perfection till
i heard u speak
now it kills me just to hear u say the simple things
waking up is hard to do
sleeping is impossible too
everything is reminding me of u
what can i do?
its not right
im not okay
maybe we are better off this way
im not fine
im in pain
its harder everyday
yet maybe we are better off this way
its better that we break
im the fool that let u slip away
id chase u just to hear u say
u're scared n u think im insane
the city looks so nice from here
pity that i cant see it clearly
while u stand there it all disappears
life has these days that knock u down
but its all just a rollercoaster anyway

..~..i sit here with tears in my eyes yet im not sad...just miss every last bit of u..~..

..new phone..

O-o i got a new phone! o-O

`if u need me..ill be busy playing =)

..good morning..

`besides ur face next to mine =')
one of my favorite sights in the morning

O-o i miss him o-O

`im a mess...cant eat, cant sleep, cant think about nething else

-if neone doesnt know...i looove eating n sleeping...my world is upside down-

..what a day..

--forced myself to say goodbye to a situation that made me & kept me deliriously happy...

--work was a mess...oh was that cause of me?

--threw up all afternoon...another reason work was chaotic?

--everything just doesnt seem the same...

.~.so what do u do when u find urself stuck .~.

--afraid to move forward, too late to turn back n all u wanna do is sit n revel in the moment right now...

--knowing that things could never change..n although the current situation is satisfying and all u need at the moment, u know in the future u'll want more

--i was once told, 'timing is everything...n ours is just not now..' is it crazy to think that if our stars collided a few months earlier...i'd be sitting with u in ur arms rite now?

--i forced myself to make a decision...say goodbye to the one person that put a smile on my face each n every day n save myself now, run away n hide, protect myself from the future i know will not be in my favor or keep living my little fantasy out until the one day in the longrun i get hurt...

what can i say im a wimp...afraid of being hurt...

--i dont regret a moment not a second...u were my everything... =')

..tbone on tv..

lookie who i found on tv.. =)
pbs..channel 1010 @ 6:00
i made the whole family watch
n learn about playing fair
no cheating! =) lesson for the day..ahaha!

..back to black..

`i FINALLY went to go visit kristen at school

O-o the color that went into my hair o-O

`u cant tell me that this doesnt look absolutely disgusting!

`i must have a large head with lots of hair...i used three bowls!

O-o kristen n i o-O

O-o all pau o-O

O-o i likey...o-O

`absurd how i used to pay hundreds of dollars for Love to dimensionally color my hair lighter & lighter and now i am paying to get my hair colored darker & darker because now my hair won't stay dark on its own...

`thanks Kristen...u da bestest =P

..Marley & Me..

`this book had me in tears, crying like a big baby

O-o.my special edition hard cover copy..thank u granny.o-O

`not that i already dont, but this book made me really apprecitate my lil pup

`spoiled lil tinkie..

-notice how she gets to sleep next to the wall...on top of all the blankets...with my blankie...n u see that chew stick, although she never finishes chewing a whole one she needs a new one each nite as if rechewing a stick is just unheard of

-although without her who would wake me up multiple times each night for random things such as a toy falling off the bed, wanting to be let back on the bed, or the most important the infamous paper boi!

.~.the things that really matter in life..Loyalty. Courage. Devotion. Simplicity. Joy.~.

.~.A dog has no use for fancy cars or big homes or designer clothes. Status symbols mean nothing to them...A dog judges others not by their color or creed or class but by who they are inside. A dog doesnt care if you are rich or poor, educated or illiterate, clever or dull. Give them your heart and they will give you theirs.~.

.~.Animal lovers are a special breed of human, generous of spirit, full of empathy, perhaps a little prone to sentimentality, and with hearts as big as a cloudless sky.~.

..bad day gone good...

`2day was a perfect example...

`dont give up, when things are looking down, there is no where else to go but up

~this morning started out rough

-i woke up on time (a plus) @ 6:00 (who wakes up this early?!?)

-i told Shauna i would pick us up some Jamba n be @ work by 6:30

-i actually get a movin n i seem to be on time...i get to Jamba n who knew they open at 6:30

-so instead of sleepin in my bed..im outside of Jamba waiting for them to open =p

-i get to work, parking in the front (a plus) n i notice the crazy girl works with me..grrrreat

-i finally get into the pharmacy n the refill center is broken!! grrrr...my quota!

-so my pharmacy seems to be an utter mess...things everywhichwhere...oh the madness

-Shauna n i survive till lunch, we decide to go to one place n it starts to rain so we settle on another place, guess who is closed?!?

-we end up at kit n kitchen...

O-o i told her to be careful..this is what she does o-O

O-o my chopstick broke in three pieces! this is unheard of! o-O

`so back to the turbulent pharmacy...

-i put in my cd, pump myself up...we can do this!

-refill quota met n overshot...take that refill center!

-two people went home sick, one had jury duty...three people short n still finished everything i was supposed to...

-left the pharm on time! came home n took a walk around the valley with my kids, what a fiasco but still was exercise n made the kids happy...well kinda.. =)

O-o mommy brought me roses from her garden o-O

-good dinner with grumpa n granny...n flowers from mommy

-yay me... =)

`so although the day started out on the negative spectrum of the scale, it ended on a happy note

`hope your day was more like the end to mine... smile =)

.~.tomorrow is another day.~.

..it was a looong week..

`hopes for a sweeter upcoming week



O-o my onlee piece of serenity o-O

`i dont know why but this past week didnt seem to want to end

`i didn't go out on my usual nights..heck i didnt even go out

`flaked out on one too many things...whoops! sorry guys..just couldn't seem to find the motivation to get there

`went to work late twice in one week...once, didnt have an excuse in the world to help me, i got awoken by my manager callin me on the phone...i had to ask him.."what day is it?"

`i dont want to put the blame on anything but myself but i really think this new b/c is the cause of all my struggles...it makes me fatter, which in turn makes me sad, which leaves me a sad fat girl sittin at home with my kids (dont laugh...its true!)

`so..i decided to take back control of my life...i made a schedule for this upcoming week...with time slots for the kids...exercise (something i reaaaallly need to do)...n i decided to look for another job to challenge myself n really start applying for schools

`i thought i wanted to play...i cant lie it was fun...but its just not me, i think im done

`i found something/someone worth my time n effort so enough playing n time to get on with life...make something of myself n start taking care of those who mean the most to me

O-o.look out world, i'm on another mission.0-O

..good ol moi days..

`congratulations mommy Jenny...

`i miss these peoples...

O-o.cheryl.o-O

`always makin sure everyone is doin what they r supposed to

`she may be lil but she packs a mean punch

O-o.jenny.o-O

`either love her or hate her..i happen to love!

`shes the one having a baby...yet i look fatter!!

O-o.lyn.o-O

`she is what i am to shorty..i learned from her

`i onlee see her out n about now...since now she has a real grown up job

`half of Jenny's baby shower

`we all used to work 2gether @ moi

`they used to help keep the pharm runnin smoothly..come back!!

`Jenny...i love to babysit...leave the munchkin with me!